Going to the gym

My brother-in-law just left for three months of training to be an army chaplain.  I'm very proud of him, but we miss him already.  Before he left he encouraged me to keep up my efforts to become healthier.  He transfered his gym membership over to me and told me he will keep paying the monthly fee if I go!  He's so generous!

I've never had a gym membership before.  In fact, at university there is a gym on campus that students can use for free.  I went only a few times.  A few years ago I went and sat outside of the gym for fifteen minutes before chickening out and leaving.  The atmosphere is very intimidating to me.  All of the equipment I don't know what to do with and all of the mirrors... ugh.  My brain knows that people are not there to judge me, but I can't get my emotions to believe it.  The few times that I have gone to the gym successfully I had to keep telling myself over and over that people weren't there to watch me or judge me.  That's very emotionally tiring.

I am determined to put that behind me.  They say that the more often you do something that is difficult, the easier it becomes.

This morning I met with a personal trainer at the gym; new members get a free consultation.  I am thinking about setting up weekly appointments with a personal trainer to become more familiar with the equipment and learn how to use it properly.)  The personal trainer briefly ran me through some exercises I can do at the gym.  He talked to me about the importance of setting specific goals.  He had asked me what my goals are and I told him I want to lose weight but I don't have any specific goals.  He said that a lot of people don't set specific goals because they are afraid of letting themselves down, but in the end they are unable to accomplish anything.  He compared this to setting a goal to graduate college but not setting a goal to study for your tests or even to pass your classes.  If you don't set specific goals you are a lot less likely to accomplish anything.

So... for the next three months I am setting a goal of going to the gym three times a week.
I am also setting a goal to forgive myself for failures.  In fact, I am going to choose to not think of them as failures but as learning experiences.

The 20lb mark!

I have officially lost a total of 20 lbs!  Well, 20.5 to be precise!!!  WOOHOOO!  I started out at 323lbs.  I am now 302.5 lbs.  I have lost 6% of my starting body weight.  My BMI has gone from 46.3 to 43.4.  I am so close to breaking below 300, I can taste it!  It's been YEARS since I was below 300!

This past week was great!  I got back into exercising.  I did a lot of walking for aerobic exercise, and I threw in a little pilates for some strength training.  It felt great!  At the beginning of March I HATED exercise, and now I look forward to it!  How cool is that!  I am still eating relatively healthy, but my intake did go up more than it should have this past week.  I am going to try to watch that this week.  I don't need my stomach to stretch back out to where it was.  But, hey!  I lost 20 lbs!  I'm feeling great!  I'm gonna go conquer the world!

click the chart to see a larger version

Back on track

My weight is going down again.  April sure has been a month of ups and downs!  But that's life, I guess.  I'm going to try to use what I learned this month to make May a month of just downs (in regards to weight, of course).  As of this morning I am down to 304.6 lbs.  That's a total loss of 18.4 lbs (5.7% of my starting body weight).  I'm feeling pretty good and I have had more friends and family say that I look like I've lost weight.  That definitely makes me smile!  My clothes are getting baggier and one of my belts is no longer effective because it's smallest hole is just a little too big.  Cool.  I have a friend who said she will do up my hair all pretty once I get under 300 lbs. I'll take pictures and post them for friends and family I don't get to see regularly. :-)

I was reminded again this weekend how awesome it would be to lose more weight.  I went to see Into the Woods at Cornerstone (which was fantastic, by the way, and made me want to be in a musical again) and the seats - although not as tight of a fit as it would have been a few months ago - are still uncomfortably tight.  It's not fun to have my mass overtake my seat and bulge over into the space of the person sitting next to me.  If I hadn't been sitting next to a close friend I would have been very embarrassed.  Hah!  Even writing about it is embarrassing.  I'm blushing!

I did better this past week about eating out.  Still went out a couple of times, but only got healthy food.  Didn't go on any real walks, but I have decided that I no longer can use lack of time as an excuse for lack of exercise.  From now on, if I don't have time to go on a walk, I'm going to do some other aerobic activity for at least fifteen minutes.  Seriously, fifteen minutes is definitely doable, no matter how busy one gets.  Today I did some lunges for fifteen minutes.  It got my heart rate to go up and stay within the target heart rate for a minimum of twelve minutes and it used my major muscles in a repetitive movement... those are the only qualifiers for aerobic exercise!  Cool, huh?  I'd like to go for a walk later today as well.  I miss it. 

Yesterday was the birthday of one of my brother-in-laws and we had a party.  I brought a bunch of different fruits and veggies and stuck them on skewers.  Everyone drizzled their favorite salad dressing on their veggie skewers and on the fruit skewers we drizzled melted chocolate.  Yummy!  I was pleased that I had made something healthy to share with my family that turned out to be tasty.  Good times!

I recieved a blessing from my Mom, too.  To encourage me to keep walking, she bought me a pedicure set.  I used it this week and it was wonderful!  My feet look great and feel great!  Thanks, Mom!  I love you!  I can't wait to go for another walk!

Book Review - The New FIT OR FAT

I went to Goodwill yesterday and, as usual, found some great buys.  One of these is a book called The New FIT OR FAT by Covert Bailey.  My review is about this particular book which was published in 1991. There is a newer edition which I have not read called The Ultimate FIT OR FAT, which was published in 2000.

This book is an easy read with a lot of good information and some great tips for people who want to start to incorporate exercise into their lifestyle.

One of the things he talks about is why dieting alone is not the healthy way to lose weight.   People who have excess fat have a body chemistry that converts calories into fat.  When a person gains fat, it they gain it in their muscles as well as under their skin.  Dieting removes subcutaneous fat, but not intramuscular fat.  Exercise (especially aerobic exercise) reduces intramuscular fat, "increases muscle, tones it, alters its chemistry, and increases its metabolic rate.  All of these cause you to burn more calories even when asleep."

After explaining all of the benefits of exercise, Bailey goes on to explain how to exercise to lose weight.  He describes the difference between aerobic exercise and anaerobic exercise, and why aerobic exercise is the most beneficial way to lose weight.  He defines aerobic exercise as "steady exercise, exercise that demands an uninterrupted output from your muscles for a minimum of twelve minutes."  In contrast, anaerobic exercise occurs when you overexert yourself.  "If you make a muscle work too hard, it will need more oxygen than your heart and blood can deliver."

Also outlined in the book is a list of aerobic exercises that he recommends and how to begin doing aerobic exercise if you are a beginner or if you are excessively overweight.

This book has made me excited to exercise!  Breaking down exercise into 12 minute segments feels so much more doable to me right now than thinking about exercising for 2 hours straight.  I also feel like I can go at my own pace and not worry about how slow I am compared to other people.  I can't remember the last time I felt excited about exercise!  Woohoo!

I took a 45 minute walk today and it felt great!

The sun was shining and it was simply gorgeous outside.  It was a perfect day for a walk.  I am so grateful for everyone's encouragement.  It's really helping me to keep going with this.

And I had yummy healthy food today, too.  Kristi made an amazing stir-fry that was just delightful! :-)

Going for a Walk

I've decided that this week I am going to add some exercise.  I'm going to start with walking because, well, I'm too scared to do anything else at the moment.  It is really difficult for someone my size to do many of the exercises that other people might consider basic; so I'm going to start where I can feel comfortable and I am not going to feel guilty about it.  I figure adding any kind of movement is an improvement at this point.